i have so many questions, and many of them i'm either too lazy or confused to put them into words.

one that just popped up today and makes me curious is about prayer.

if God knows everything
and takes care of us,
what is the purpose of prayer?

is it to show God that we're really dedicated and that this thing/event/person matters to us?
do we need to pray over and over and over and over and over for that thing/event/person or is once enough?
[this one bothers me alot:] is prayer just a centering of the human psyche towards one need or desire, and a focusing of the human spirit to will the event to happen, and not a result of divine interaction?

i'm caught between so many views.

God is big
i talk to God a lot; not as much as i used to.
i've always struggled with corporate prayer and prayer time, even at meals. i say thank you, and i will be reverent, but i've lost the will to pray.

and part of me feels bad.
but i don't want to have to train myself and then say it's God.
i don't want to read the Bible all the time
because common sense says if that's what i read, that is what is going to be in my head, and so i'm going to think about it more often.

no, i want to think about it because i'm seized by this great love.
and i want to know.

why prayer is so important
and why we think so big of ourselves that our prayers change things.

that sounded awful.
i believe in prayer? i say that as a question...because...
i just don't understand.


my life plans.

well, my very likely, very strongly possible plans for the next year or two.

i feel the need to preface this post with a video.


visit this link. Please.

did you visit it? okay, good. i'm sorry if that is stuck in your head. well, not that sorry. a little bit sorry. i rather enjoy it.


my plans for the coming year.

eeeeeee this is exciting.

okay. so.

there is currently a plan in the works for me to get my masters degree from mercer, and as part of my masters' thesis, i would design a water supply system for the Pokot tribe.

and i would be able to go and install it next summer.

in Kenya.

I would also possibly be working with student affairs doing advertisement for campus organizations, as well as helping Laura (Dr. Lackey--who is currently on her way to Kenya until the end of June) with a textbook she is writing...editing and drawing...all fun stuff!

so, blogosphere, friends and family, i just wanted to give you a little taste of what may very well happen in the next year or so.

whoo hoo!

i'm feelin' good today :) much love, friends.